"Young boy abducted by old man, falls in love with sister, refuses family business, kills father, dances with little bears."
"Ship hits iceberg, sinks."
"Everybody wants what Meg Ryan is having. If only they could tell she was actually faking it."
"Hamlet, with lions, in Africa."
"Tom Cruise wants the truth. Contrary to popular opinion, it turns out he can handle it."
"Sulky teen fancies local vampire. They do not have sex."
"Kevin Bacon plays chicken with tractor & dances so hard he breaks the law. Over an 80's power soundtrack. Special."
"Young boy gets in car with old scientist guy. He takes him forward in time. No one questions their friendship."
"Large fish terrorises town. Description of war experience strangely moving. Suggestion of bigger boat proves valid."
"Merry band of WWII POWs plan escape from prison. They all get caught."
"Annoying Nun runs amok in Salzburg with kids wearing curtains. Marries a wooden plank and gets chased by Nasties."
"Man wrongly imprisoned. Takes 25 years to dig himself out. Makes own chess set."
"Little bearded bloke from Jaws builds mashed potato mountain."
"Moonlighting detective wonders how it can all happen to the same guy again."
"He builds it. They come."
"Two cowboys kiss and cuddle in a tent. Their wives are NOT impressed."
"Little boy grows up impressing local bad men, becomes one of them, hangs out with mental version of cousin Vinny."
"Writer on winter retreat plagued by irritating wife, child & ghosts. Adminsters brisk justice."
"Insufferable child grows up, marries his babysitter, betrays his mentor, gets sliced and diced and a new outfit. Noooooooo!!!"
"Neurotic brown-noser pines for depressed mistress, eats spaghetti, plays cards, wins her heart."
