Worst Career Moves

We're not saying that famous people regularly do stupid things, but…well, we don't know how to finish that sentence.

Tom Selleck turning down the part of Indiana Jones
Some say that the Magnum, P.I. producers wouldn't release him from his contract to do the flick; others say that Selleck found Lassiter and High Road to China more to his liking. Either way, the lesson is clear: No matter how wondrous and munificent it may be, never, ever take career advice from your mustache.

Brian Dunkleman leaving American Idol after season one
He reportedly found the show to be increasingly cruel, which means he agreed with our bleeding ears. His departure led to a string of unforeseen events, most notably Ryan Seacrest becoming the next Dick Clark. Dunkleman out, indeed.

Chevy Chase bailing on Saturday Night Live after a season and a half
Sure he had a pretty good run immediately thereafter: Foul Play, Fletch, Caddyshack. But after falling out with his former SNL cronies, Chase had fewer like-minded collaborators. Once he fought with Bill Murray on the SNL set, for example, there was little chance he'd be considered for the second-banana roles in flicks like Ghostbusters. Additionally, while Chevy Chase might not have aged well, his poor decision-making sure has—he reportedly decides to do lots of crap.

Vince Vaughn playing Norman Bates in the remake of Psycho
So you explode out of nowhere in Swingers, flashing more first-flick comedic chops than any funnyman not named Eddie Murphy. Your next move has to be something similarly giggle-worthy, right? Nope. You go the I'm-so-very-versatile route by smarming it up in a shot-for-shot remake of Psycho, with one of the few additions being a scene in which you work yourself into a masturbatory frenzy. And yet you don't immediately shit-can your agent with great prejudice. You are a nicer per

Alec Baldwin's career-long self-sabotage
Where to begin? He ditches one of those rare gigs that keep on giving—as Jack Ryan in the Tom Clancy flicks—to star with future wife Kim Basinger in The Marrying Man (huh?) and then again after they were married in The Getaway (huh, who, wha, huh?). He evolves into a skilled, reliable character actor (The Cooler, The Aviator), then starts popping off against the vice president ("a lying, thieving oil whore and a murderer of the U.S. Constitution").

Georg George Lucas and the Wachowski Brothers contracting a lethal case of sequelitis
After the cinematic barbarism that was Star Wars: Episode 1—The Phantom Menace, Attack of the Clone-Eating Superbots, and Revenge of the Sith Sense and the disorienting double shot of The Matrix Reloaded and The Matrix Revolutions, savvy viewers went back to the videotape. There they discovered that the first three Star Wars flicks contain about 3.5 hours of watchable action (all of The Empire Strikes Back, the second half of Star W
e Lucas and the Wachowski Brothers contracting a lethal case of sequelitis
After the cinematic barbarism that was Star Wars: Episode 1—The Phantom Menace, Attack of the Clone-Eating Superbots, and Revenge of the Sith Sense and the disorienting double shot of The Matrix Reloaded and The Matrix Revolutions, savvy viewers went back to the videotape. There they discovered that the first three Star Wars flicks contain about 3.5 hours of watchable action (all of The Empire Strikes Back, the second half of Star W

Michael Jordan ditching the Bulls to play minor league baseball
Irrefutable proof that dumb jocks can be just as dumb as dumb actors and dumb singers and dumb dummies. As a hitter, Jordan was a terrific jump shooter. Urban legend has it that he wasn't even the best athlete on the Birmingham Barons, the minor league club for which he toiled for two spectacularly middling seasons. Ray Durham, then a freakishly fit prospect, was said to have outjumped MJ during a conditioning drill.

Shelley Long leaving Cheers
We know, we know—how could she possibly have turned down the ferociously droll Troop Beverly Hills, in which her not-at-all-like-Diane-Chambers character leads a bunch of spoiled twerps into the sticks? Sometimes a script shall not be denied, we suppose.

David Caruso bailing on NYPD Blue after its first season
Brooding one-note loners with phosphorescent orange hair shouldn't look a gift horse in the mouth. It's true, ask anyone. It's in the Bible somewhere.

Ben Affleck not staging his own death after Good Will Hunting
Think about it. Had Affleck disappeared under mysterious circumstances after Good Will Hunting charmed everyone and their mother, he'd be remembered as a promising screenwriter and quirky character actor. By living to make the likes of Daredevil and Jersey Girl, he reduced himself in our eyes to a bloated stooge prone to merging his on-screen and offscreen lives. It's tragic, really