Top 20 Movie Monsters

Thursday, July 9, 2009

Top 20 Movie Monsters

There’s nothing quite like a movie monster.

No, we are not talking about Liz Hurley, Catherine Zeta Jones or Rosie O’Donnell, we are talking about hideous creatures that thrive on the weak and the unholy scent of death. Again, we are not talking about Liz Hurley, Catherine Zeta Jones or Rosie O’Donnell.

Anyway, a good movie monster can add real bite (literally) to even the most mundane films.

They can shock, terrify and even inspire highly-profitable marketing spin-offs. We just can’t get enough of them. But why? Is it because we are so sick of being at the top of the food chain? Are we really that bored? Or is just because we take great pleasure in watching a predator outwit its prey?

Truth is, how the hell should we know? Who do you think I am, David frigging Attenborough?

Anyway, in our latest excuse to write some random list, we have decided to expose the monsters with a little more bite. The creatures which really make the feature. And no we are not talking horror icons like Dracula, Freddie, Jason or Michael Myers, or just beastly humans like Hannibal. We are talking horrible, slavering beasts with a taste for human flesh.

And no, we are still not talking about Liz Hurley, Catherine Zeta Jones or Rosie O’Donnell.

Enjoy!

20. Sarlacc
Movie: Star Wars : The Return of the Jedi

A giant anus in the desert which eats you and you are digested for 1,000 years. Now that’s pretty scary.

19. Giant Claw

Sorriest-looking thing on two wings – but who cares?

18. Worms
Movie: Deep Rising

Pretty disgusting worms from a little gem of a horror movie.

17. Stripe
Movie: Gremlins

Best Mohican we’ve ever seen.

16. Pinhead
Movies: Hellraiser series

Don’t ever play with nail guns.

15. The Thing
Movie: The Thing

Don’t fancy yours much.

14. Gamera
Movies: Daikaijû Gamera and a few others

A giant, flying turtle that was launched in Japan as a rival to Godzilla during the 60s. Among some of his other names is ‘Friend To All Children’. We think he should keep quiet about that one.

13. The Marshmallow Man
Movie: Ghostbusters

He’s so sweet.

12. Crawlers
Movie: The Descent

Stopped us from going pot-holing again.

11. Werewolf
Movie: An American Werewolf In London

Americans?! You come over here, shag our women, take our jobs and turn into man-eating wolves.

10. Pale Man
Movie: Pan’s Labyrinth

Really quite horrible.

9. Skeletons
Movie: Jason and the Argonauts

Scared the hell out of us when we were kids.

8. Shelob
Movie: Lord Of The Rings: The Return Of The King

Imagine finding that in your bath.

7. Tyrannosaurus Rex
Movies: Jurassic Park series

True story - a friend of ours’ mum after watching Jurassic Park asked: ‘Dinosaurs: They are extinct, aren’t they?’ Guess the T-Rex really did push new boundaries.